The Lonely Polygamist (book review)

   Who recommended this book to me? Was it you, Birthday Girl Julia? Or was it Margi? Or just plain ol' Goodreads, based on who KNOWS what profile criteria? Anyway, someone sent this title my way, and I am so glad. It is yet another relatively new release I might not have tackled without someone's prompting.

The Lonely Polygamist by Brady Udall

   The Lonely Polygamist by Brady Udall, The Random House Group, 2010. 

599 pages of pure modern literary blissful torture.

   The experience of reading this book was very much like eating a giant, heavy, extremely tart and juicy, crisp green apple. You know, the kind of apple with a smooth, waxy skin and crunchy green-white flesh that upon being bit causes your right eye to squeeze shut and your neck to tense and you shudder from the tartness, yet the intense sweetness that follows and the juice that runs down your chin are so unmatched that before swallowing that bite you take another? The kind of apple that, though its natural sugars for a while give you that empty-stomach nauseous feeling, you believe may be the perfect antidote to all the junk you've been eating lately? The Lonely Polygamist is not entirely a smooth and easy, succulent, buttery, tempt-me-with-your-cheese-and-chocolate read. But it is all of those things once in a while, when it's not being so tart it's almost painful. And the sweetness that follows its tartness is priceless. That's about the best way I can relay the emotional experience of reading this very believable human story.

   The main character is Golden Richards, a middle-aged polygamist living out in the desert with his expanding patchwork family, which happens to be coming apart at the seams. There is an ostrich. There is a brothel. There is a nuclear test site. There is a Mormon church community, though that is more backdrop to the story than focus (I didn't take this as a religious comment at all). There are tawdry if awkward sex scenes, complicated marital relationships, and absolutely heart wrenching coming-of-age inner narratives. Honestly, the book is so tightly layered and elegantly told that it almost has to be an exact telling of these characters'  real life stories. Or does Brady Udall truly have such a fantastic understanding of the human heart? At several points in the story I was in physical pain worrying about the people. I caught myself praying for one of the wives once and one of the sons several times.

   Are you the least bit curious about polygamy or polyamory? Among so many other surprises, Udall lifts the veil a little to reveal a shining aspect I had never really considered:

At this, she could only smile; he couldn't have given her a more perfect, watertight answer. Because this, after all, was the basic truth they all chose to live by; that love was no finite commodity. That is was not subject to the cruel reckoning of addition and subtraction, that to give to one did not necessarily mean to take from another; that the heart, in its infinite capacity- even the confused and cheating heart of the man in front of her, even the paltry thing now clenched and faltering inside her own chest- could open itself to all who would enter, like a house with windows and doors thrown wide, like the heart of God itself, vast and accommodating and holy, a mansion of rooms without number, full of multitudes without end.

   What do you think?  I have to admit, this is frighteningly parallel to so many things I have been studying lately, just the open, accepting, unselfish, freeing nature of pure Love. And no, I am not thinking about polygamy; I am just thinking about being less clenched in my own chest.

   I hope you will consider reading this book. It's not for the faint of heart, unless you are looking for something to embolden you to your own life and help you find the teeth to take control. It's also not for the  highly opinionated, unless you are in search of something to mellow and stretch out your rigidity. I almost put the book back on my shelf a few times. I had no idea where the story was going, and it worried me. But page after page I was drawn more deeply into the hearts and minds of these characters, and it mattered to me more and more what happened to them. I am so happy to have stuck with Golden and his clan through to the end. Which, it turns out, tastes very much like a weird new beginning. The tartness was followed by so much sweetness, and I am full.

   I gave The Lonely Polygamist 5 stars on Goodreads. Well done Mr. Udall. I will find more of your titles.

"What a gyp!"*
~Rusty Richards, age 11
XOXOXOXO

*This novel is anything but a gyp. But I got such a kick out of one of the son's frequent use of this phrase, I had to share it.

The Horse Whisperer: a Book Review

   I am so excited! Tonight is our famous little Oklahoma book club's discussion dinner of The Horse Whisperer by Nicholas Evans. True to our group's name, Dinner Club With a Reading Problem, a feast is planned. This time around our hostess is Amber and she has arranged a ranch-style dinner of cubed beef sandwiches and all the luscious trimmings. The rest of us ladies are bringing sides, desserts, and drinks. Last night I made Pioneer Woman's cilantro-jalapeno slaw, so it should be nice and flavorful by party time. Yum. I think Amber's theme is perfect for a story set mostly in the ranch-lands of Montana. Just perfect.

   I'll take photos tonight and share more about book club soon... For now, a quick book review.

   Sometimes I feel funny reviewing a piece of literature that is neither "classic" nor "new release," but this title deserves some praise anyway. And who knows? It could end up becoming a modern classic. To me, at least, that's how good it is.

   The Horse Whisperer is a complex and moving story told about believable characters whose lives all eventually revolve around one horse and his girl. Or one girl and her horse, however you look at it. Right at the start of the book, horse and rider together suffer a life-threatening accident and are forever changed. The events that precipitate had me hooked immediately. The stories are layered, and despite their beauty both in emotion and the senses, not without a lot of pain.

   Set primarily in the ranch-lands of Montana, a place I have never been except through the floriferous, enchanting descriptions written by Evans,  The Horse Whisperer is absolutely transporting. Evans uses the topography and unique gifts of the land there to convey several messages about the characters. And then he explores each character with really satisfying, but not exhausting, depth.

Two creeks ran through the Booker brothers' land and they gave the ranch its name, the Double Divide. They flowed from adjacent folds of the mountain front and in their first half mile they looked like twins. The ridge that ran between them here was low, at one point almost low enough for them to meet, but then it rose sharply in a rugged chain of interlocking bluffs, shouldering the creeks apart. Forced thus to seek their separate ways, they now became quite different.

   He lends the readers a glimpse of lifestyles we are unlikely to know ourselves, both the life of a fast-paced big-city editor and the grittier, more remote, but perhaps not so simple life of a full-time cowboy.

   Evans paints horses and horsemanship in the most honest and poetic light I have ever enjoyed. He illuminates the relationship between horse and man and leaves little room for doubt about what is at risk between the two, and what is available.

And though later he came pretending friendship, the alliance with man would ever be but fragile, for the fear he struck into their hearts was too deep to be dislodged.

   Then this...

"He's not going to look back if you don't," he said. "They're the most forgiving creatures God ever made." 

   The book offers romance, even passion and sex (making it unsuitable for young readers, although the horses may draw young readers in!), tumultuous parent-child struggles, questions about legacy and independence, survival, honesty, and of course healing. Redemption is huge in The Horse Whisperer. As the girl and horse who are so badly injured both begin to heal physically and emotionally, so do their attendant relationships. But nothing happens quite like I expected it to. The book is anything but formulaic. And I loved that. If you are able to successfully guess the ending without cheating, then you might be a psychic and should get your own television show.

If you aren't tempted yet by the story, then be tempted by the writing itself...

Some bounced back to dance in shimmering reflection on the ceiling, while the rest slanted through tot he bottom of the pool where it formed undulating patterns, like a colony of pale blue snakes that lived and died and were constantly reborn.

   A word of warning, and this goes beyond book-snobbery: The book is FAR DIFFERENT from the Robert Redford movie. They are two completely different experiences, as I am sure 100% of everyone who actually read the book will agree. I am not saying the movie is horrible... It is just not aligned with this book. It's more like, someone skimmed the book and threw in a few details just to hit a "similarities minimum." The ending is EXACTLY what most movie-watchers might expect or hope for. NOTHING like what the book throws at you. Which is an emotional sledgehammer.

   Okay, I hope you make time to read this book! Read it to open and cleanse old wounds. Read it to spark some hope for a hopeless situation. Read it to fantasize. Read it to broaden your cultural awareness. Read it to soak in poetry. Read it for fun.

   If you have already devoured The Horse Whisperer, what did you think? Spill your literary guts here!

   Now I must be on my way. I have an ice chest to pack, teeth to brush, and a clean t-shirt to slip on. Famous little Oklahoma book club awaits!

"No. But you see, Annie, where there's pain,
 there's still feeling.
 And where there's feeling, there's hope."
XOXOXOXO

 

 

 
 

Same Kind of Different as Me (book review)

   Hello again! I have another book review for you. Of course, if we are friends on Facebook or Instagram, then by now you already know I am overwhelmed and inspired by my most recent read, Same Kind of Different as Me. Upon finishing it around lunchtime this last Thursday, I fell apart in the most wonderful way. This is the current conquest by our famous little Oklahoma book club, Dinner Club With a Reading Problem, and I highly recommend that all of you read it. Every single one of you. And all the people you love. I will be buying copies of this as gifts.

http://www.samekindofdifferentasme.com/

   Same Kind of Different as Me is a true story told from the perspective of two very different but, as the title implies, ultimately very similar men. Their lives and paths cross in a beautiful and unpredictable way, and the shared journey flowers and fruits into more than either of them could have imagined. Yes I know that sounds a bit vague, but just read it! I do not want to ruin it for you.

   There is a sort of sequel available, and we understand a big motion picture in in the works too! This is a bandwagon you want to be on.

********************

   Over the past couple of years I have read a myriad of books that fall under the "spiritual" category, and this one kind of does, but it is different. It is refreshing and inspirational but not preachy or intellectualized. It's a modern day tale of spiritual victory, true love, lasting friendship (not catch and release), and much more. Same Kind of Different as Me just tells a great story. Plainly. Beautifully. Honestly. I felt as motivated by its messages as I did when reading Bonhoeffer earlier this year and moved to tears in a way that I haven't been by a book in a long time. Bonus? The story is absolutely delicious. Addictive. I picked it up and couldn't put it down until the last page, a few tearful hours later.

   This Friday night our Dinner Club With a Reading Problem met at Tracy's house to discuss this treasure. We all hugged, laughed, and enjoyed plate after plate of good food.

My friends provided lots of healthier fare, but I was starved
and ate eleven hot dogs and hamburgers.

   We traded insights the book gave us into our own hearts, admitting prejudices we barely knew still lingered. Several of the ladies shared stories about sharecroppers from their families in Oklahoma and Texas. We talked about marriage, infidelity and healing, judging each other for our "sins," adult illiteracy, homelessness, and mortality.

   Our book club gatherings are always rich with affection and conversation, and Friday night was no different. What was different with this title is that 100% of our readers thoroughly enjoyed it. That doesn't happen too often. We all fell in love with the characters and the message. I think it's fair to say that we all felt changed, too. For the better.

Tracy you NAILED IT!!!

   I must mention that the timing of reading this book is also amazing. On the heels of Marianne Williamson's tutorial book A Return to Love, the philosophical message is crystallized into something digestible. Real life stuff. The bottom line of this true story is just love, love, love. Real love. Powerful, life changing, darkness-piercing, dream fulfilling, mistake forgiving, addiction breaking LOVE.

 

   I wrapped it up feeling like every good thing is not only possible but actually likely to happen. I feel like I can be part of (a conduit for) some very important solutions in our life. And, as always, I feel even closer to my book club girls. Thank you, DeLana, for guiding us to Same Kind of Different as Me. What a gift.

"Just tell em I'm a nobody that's tryin to tell everybody

'bout Somebody that can save anybody.

That's all you need to tell em."

~Denver Moore

   Several of my friends outside of book club have already gobbled this up, too. Have you?

"We Woke Up."
  ~Ron Hall
  xoxoxoxo

Shanghai Girls: Book Review

   I have another book review for you guys. This is a sweet and juicy little paperback I snagged from the back of my friend Seri's MINIVAN at our June book club dinner. She is a self-professed book hoarder, and of course we all are, so we love her for it. Thank you Seri! And I still owe you $5 plus however many fresh eggs will pay for those fresh pears. Yum.

   Okay. The book is Shanghai Girls by Lisa See. Published in 2009, it is a New York Times bestseller and a luscious little piece of historical fiction. I thoroughly enjoyed it, right up until the very last word. More on that later.

Shanghai Girls by Lisa See

   Shanghai Girls is set between British-territory China and Los Angeles Chinatown, right as World War II is building pressure and "Communism" is the hottest, most dangerous word anywhere. It traces the coming of age of two Chinese sisters who could not be more different or more complimentary. Their story continues through several decades and along an aching, undulating family saga. It also offers that special ground-level perspective of important historical events, like the Japanese invasion of China and the Hoover-era witch hunt for Communists in America.

   I like historical fiction. I particularly like historical fiction based around the two World Wars; the best samplings tend to be textural, emotional, and revealing of so many moral and social issues that are relevant to us now, all over again. For example?

• Emigration and assimilation into new places
• Immigration and the attendant fears and prejudices
• Unemployment and family communities
• Liberty versus dependence on the government
• Cultural evolution
• Racial tension
• Legacy versus education and progress
• Work Ethics
• The limits to which you would work, lie, or sacrifice to help your children
• "The American Dream..." and all of its flux elements

   Shanghai Girls did not disappoint. Without tasting academic but in fact just like a good personal narrative, it draws you in and involves you emotionally with the characters. It confuses you with their complex humanity (noone is all good or all bad, after all). It enchants you with scenes of places you have probably never been yourself, certainly of times you have never seen. This is the first book I have read by Lisa See, and I will be happy to find more. She writes succinctly but beautifully...

"I want to say my feeling of disgrace is hard to find,

but I'm ashamed to admit it's hidden 

just beneath the surface of my skin."

   This silly detail bears mentioning: I read the final third of this book over the past couple of nights, while wearing a really long, smooth cotton , beautiful vintage kimono. It's navy blue with white and poppy-red-orange flowers on it.I bought it at a books-and-junk store on the border of Oklahoma and Arkansas, and it is my newest favorite possession. YES I KNOW that kimonos are Japanese and not Chinese. But Japanese culture did play into the story. And anyway I felt feminine and elegant wearing it while reading this feminine and elegant story.

   Okay. I mentioned that I loved the book right up until the last word. As all believable family sagas should, the story has numerous crescendos and lulls. I grew accustomed to the boiling point and then the cool down. I read and luxuriated as the characters matured from girls into women, from fearful children into knowing and capable creatures. And I accidentally prescribed in my head where the story should lead. MISTAKE.

   Anyway, on the night that I finished it, a paragraph dropped me off at one of the boiling points. No biggie. I was excited. Then I turned the page for what I thought would be a new chapter... It was the end! The last twenty or thirty pages of the paperback were acknowledgements and author's notes! AHHH I craved so much more. I needed far more resolution that this provided, and as far as I can tell there is no sequel. So I guess my only complaint about Shanghai Girls is that it left me wanting more of the same. It was just so delicious.

  Do find this book! It's an informative yet transporting summer read. And come back tomorrow for the third and final installment of Unsolicited Advice, Marital Edition.

"I fold the letter and put it back in its envelope. 
There's nothing we can do about any of this from so far away, 
but I begin a chant- something more than a prayer, 
something more like a desperate plea:
Bring her home, bring her home, bring her home."
~Lisa See in Shanghai Girls
xoxoxo

I'm linking up with Mama Kat today.

Go check out all the other great submissions!

   And please say some prayers for my book-loving friend Seri 

and her sweet family this week, ok? Many thanks.

XOXOXOXO

Tiny Farm Update and a Book Review: Impatient With Desire

   Happy Wednesday to all! Today I have good stuff to share. Mostly, an excellent book recommendation. Scroll down for that. And? It occurred to me that in the midst of the tornado news I have been remiss in mentioning here on the blog some very, very happy news. How embarrassing! If you follow us on Facebook or Instagram then you already know that Handsome and I are enjoying the company of an adorable brand spankin' new baby llama! Yep, Seraphine finally delivered her cria exactly thirteen days ago. The baby is a little girl and is healthy and happy, growing by the hour it seems. We have named her Dulcinea del Toboso, after Don Quixote's fabled love interest and muse, but we affectionately call her Little Bit. I am pretty sure my husband has lost his big heart to this sweet little creature, and I am totally okay with that. You should see them play together.

She is the most precious thing that has ever walked on four llama hooves.

   Now... Another book review. I gobbled up this volume two weekends ago, right before the tornadoes, and really, really, really want you to read it. Really. Okay? Okay, here we go.

   First, just take a quick look-see at this cover art and make a mental note of what you think this book is about. Maybe go ahead and scribble your quickest impressions on a piece of scrap paper, also noting whether it is a book you would choose to read. Be honest.

Impatient With Desire by Gabrielle Burton, Published by Rare Bird Books

   What was your immediate reaction? I am so curious about this. Despite the fact that we all grew up hearing, "Never judge a book by its cover," I pretty much judged this little book by its cover. Harshly. And I let it languish on my dusty shelves for over a year. Neglected, shunned, unread because I thought it was a Puritan romance or something. Not my groove, man.

   How wrong I was. Luckily one recent weekend I possessed the presence of mind to actually read the story description and was immediately hooked. I plunged right in on Saturday morning, consuming a third of the story before coming up for air. Then that Sunday night I woke suddenly at 2 am, eyes unable to even blink shut, and realized I was desperate to finish the book. I crept downstairs and did so, and now I have that settled, satisfied, wonderful feeling. I want you to have this feeling too.

   I want YOU to read THIS BOOK. It is so short and so well written that you can tackle it in one average airplane ride. Or two afternoons on a lounge chair. Or three sleepless night.

   What is it about, you ask? The Donner party. You know who I'm talking about. The band of American pioneers in the mid 1800's who headed west toward California? The ones who got stuck in the snowy mountains? The group rumored to have survived by cannibalism???

   Now you're with me.

   Yes, I do feel a little bad sensationalizing this book review, but the truth is that most people probably identify the Donner party with cannibalism. It's just how our culture works. The delicious surprise here (sorry, couldn't resist) is that Impatient With Desire serves up (I really can't stop) a slow, tortuous, truly moving insight to the human experiences of starvation, isolation, hope, fear, faith, commitment, survival, and, of course, death. It really is the Donner party story like you have never heard it. Not even the History channel on its best, most creative day can grip your heart like Burton has done with this artistic and believable story.

   Burton writes in a journal format, in the voice of one woman exclusively, Mrs. Tamsen Donner. The leader's wife. Scrap all preconceived notions you might already have about this woman and prepare yourself to want to know more about her than one book can offer. It is so good. Also, just accept that all conversations you have so far had regarding cannibalism and your personal tipping points, morality, situational ethics, etc, etc... are tainted by lofty ideas and a cruel disconnect from the realities of hunger that abject.

   Then read this book.
   And discuss it all over again with smart people who have also read it.

"I used to argue that we can improve on nature, 

or at least not be as brutal as nature. 

I don't have the luxury of theoretical debates anymore, 

nor am I as sentimental as I once was." 

~Tamsen Donner, letter to her sister. 

   Much worse than judging books by their covers is the crime of judging people who have faced things we have never even imagined.

   Aside from the obvious themes, something lovely ran through the book consistently and caught my attention. It was Mrs. Donner's mantra that, "We all came here strangers to ourselves." Tamsen Donner said this repeatedly, her own understanding deepening each time, and it made more and more sense to me too. How often do we learn about our own hearts through trials? How true is it that while living life we learn about ourselves as much as or maybe more than we learn about the world?

   Many other, skinnier threads are up for grabs, too. Skinny threads, but not delicate. This book is short but packed with life.

• Patriotism and adventure...
• Early American feminism (the Donner marriage was fascinating)...
• The concept that a family is raised by community and not one parent... 
• How do we view animals? Pets, workers, food... And how do we honor them? 
• The importance of contemporaneous journalling... (I plan to blog about this very thing soon. It's cropping up everywhere I look!)
• How dangerously and wonderfully our moods can affect each other, especially in relationships like marriage and especially in close physical quarters...
• Regret, purpose, hindsight, the limited power of our own lessons learned to help others...
• The intrinsic value of physical labor...
• Also the intrinsic value of routine, schedules, and structure to combat mental fatigue...
• Life cycles and poetry...
• Religion, proselytizing, and cultural respect...
• The societal value of ceremony, the luxury of it, and the power of a well written obituary...
• The complexities of acts of faith...
• What life do we bring to a home? What actual contributions do each of us make?
• You cannot escape yourself simply by relocating.
• Which are you, at heart: a keeper of the home or an adventurer? Does your life reflect this truth?
• ...and so very many other insights to human nature, both the beautiful and the abhorrent.

   Whew! Like I said, this book is short but powerful. The author achieved something wonderful here, and I sure hope you take time to absorb and enjoy it.

My friends have sweet hook ups.

   Bonus announcement: My friend Julia with the sweet literary hook ups is who gifted me this book in the first place. She has recently intimated that I stand a pretty decent chance of meeting and interviewing the author.

   You guys. This is my favorite thing ever, meeting and interviewing authors of excellent books like this. I will of course keep you posted.

   In closing, a community question: If Gabrielle Burton visits the Lazy W, what should I serve? Steak tartare?

Read books! 
Read All the Books!!
xoxoxoxo

 

Book Review: Inside Passage

   Yo, friends. Have you, like me, been reading heavy stuff for months on end? Are you nourished, edified, and inspired, from the inside out, but at the same time feeling a bit threadbare around your sweet little bibliophile eyeballs? Have you enjoyed the snuggly winter and then the tumultuous springtime, and now are you perhaps in need of a big gulp of summertime reading pleasure? I mean, it is summer now, right? Yes, yes it is. Okay, then. I have a great book for you.

   Just last night I was very happy to polish off a relatively new title by Burt Weissbourd called Inside Passage. Released last year by Rare Bird Lit,   ***hi there sweet Julia!***  this novel of only 282 pages is part thriller, part mystery, and all suspense, human psychology, and natural beauty. Weissbrourd has added several healthy doses of sexy in there, too, so please don't hand this over to your teenager when you're done. Or your Mom. Trust me.

   We once took my Mom to see Superbad. In the theater. On the big screen. Not cool.

   That's a weird story. Let's get back to the book review.

   Set in the gorgeous and foreign-to-me Pacific Northwest, Inside Passage is no long winded epic, a fact I greatly appreciated after the reading that's been going on here lately. No, Inside Passage follows a short time line of tense and dangerous interactions between characters who hook you from the first introduction. A woman, Corey Logan, is fighting both for her life and for a life lived safely with her teenage son, who is trying to make sense of it all while going through every normal teenage boy experience. Together with allies they collect along the way, this strong but desperate mother and son duo is battling a powerful and vengeful man and all of those under his influence. Monstrous people. 

   Another woman and her son are involved, too. This woman proves herself to be desperate like Corey, but in wildly different ways. The family dynamics and insights to human behavior had me reeling several times. It's all juicy, fascinating stuff, and it is written with a light enough hand that the reader is drawn in but never exhausted. I really liked that. I need to learn how to write like that. How to speak like that. Think like that.

   I exhaust my own self is what I'm trying to say.

   Weissbourd writes efficiently, packing each paragraph with several cleanly written, informative sentences; yet his descriptions are luscious. At times I could feel the cold, salty ocean spray and smell salmon being grilled over a beach bonfire. 

Somehow this part of the world keeps cropping up in things I read. 

It all sounds incredibly beautiful, and I hope to visit someday.

   I definitely felt invested in the characters, the "good" ones, and repulsed by the "bad" ones. In fact, these dark characters rank in my opinion with some of Koontz's and King's worst imaginaries. Given more stage time, they could become cult characters themselves.

   I had not read anything by this author before, and ***TINY SPOILER ALERT*** apparently this is part of a series of books centered around a main character, the heroine Corey Logan. I only gave you that spoiler alert in case it would ruin any suspense for you regarding that character's longevity. Trust me, no matter what you think you know about the outcome, and that fact doesn't tell you much, the book is so much fun to read. Pick it up and dive in. Surrender yourself to each setting, each detail. Get inside the head of each fascinating character and work out the intricacies yourself, following the swell of action page after page. It's quite good.

   I would like to thank Julia for offering me this fun and succulent read. I would like to thank the author Burt Weissbourd for writing it. And I hope many of my friends give it a go. Good stuff you guys! Really tightly written and fast paced. Lots of action, lots of insight. If you need a reprieve, you'll like this. 

   Over and out.

   xoxoxo

Book Review: Bonhoeffer by Eric Metaxas

   I have recently devoured the most fascinating book, you guys. It is the most soul nourishing, intellectually stimulating, and flat out humbling life story that I have ever read, and now I have an aching physical need to discuss it as soon and as thoroughly as possible. Won't you please join me??

 Eric Metaxas has written the ambitious and truly illuminating Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy. 

   The very real trouble, though, is that for a couple of weeks now I've been trying to pin down my thoughts on this eye-opening piece of biographical art, but with limited success. It's honestly been like trying to nail jello to a wall, my own amateurish thoughts are so scattered and varied. I'll try to dive in and and offer you something here, but please just read this book for yourself. It's so good, for so many reasons.

   Okay, here we go. Everybody take a deep breath.

   You are surely familiar with early twentieth century greats like Albert Einstein, C.S. Lewis, Franklin Roosevelt, Winston Churchill, Mahatma Gandhi, and Pablo Picasso. Each in his own way, these brilliant minds were busy nourishing and challenging the world during one of its darkest chapters. But what do you know about Dietrich Bonhoeffer? He was a contemporary of those men, too, and a peer in many ways, a German citizen whose contributions to history during these incredible decades have gone largely unnoticed.

   Until now.

   Dietrich Bonhoeffer was everything the book title promises... a brilliant and devoted pastor and a cultural prophet, a spy against his own government, and ultimately a martyr for his cause.

"As the couple took in the hard news that the good man who was their son was now dead, so too, many English took in the hard news that the dead man who was a German was good. Thus did the world again begin to reconcile itself to itself."

   This month, thanks to a bold reading assignment by the lovely Ms. Misti C., our famous little Oklahoma book club is on the verge of discussing this thick, hefty biography. I am so excited. This book produced so much sparkling thought and has generated so much worthwhile conversation here at the farm, that I actually believe it could be used as a solid textbook for either a history class or a theology class or both. At least, I'd very much like to see my daughters and nieces and nephews all read this. That's how much historical perspective and spiritual grit is offered in these 542 pages.

   The blockish paperback copy I purchased covers German and world history, religion, philosophy, culture, family dynamics, romance, politics, and more. It also has at the very back several pages of discussion points and questions for further study. Handsome and I have already spent many hours exchanging ideas on the questions raised, and I can imagine that the book club dinner at the end of this week will be one for the record books!

   Misti suggested posting multiple times on the book, and I just might use the discussion questions to do that.

********************

   This book has really affected me. I have to say that not only is Dietrich Bonhoeffer's life story itself fascinating and motivating... moving me to deepen my religious questioning and purify my relationship with God... but the prose is just wonderful. It makes me want to be a better writer. Metaxas manages to inform the reader with thousands of historical facts and foreign names while constantly building heavy drama and spinning the intricate secret tales of World War II. It is a cleanly told story, not over-romanticized in my opinion, but still reverent and humane. The best possible way a story like this can be told.

   Metaxas starts with Bonhoeffer's childhood, providing context of his upbringing and his value system. By learning about his parents' contrasting but complementing personalities and views on the world, the reader can easily follow through this man's personal evolution. It all makes so much sense when you see his adult life as the culmination of his childhood.

   And by learning more about what life and politics were like in defeated Germany at the end of the first World War, the reader gains a fresh perspective on how an evil man like Adolf Hitler was able to rise to such staggering power. Seeing that timeline from an inside, ground-level view puts everything in a different light. The complexities of being German but not Nazi, or of being patriotic but not socialist, all of it is wildly eye opening. Then add the dimension of fundamental changes in the German church during those years, and the stage is set for revolution and revival. Thrilling stuff, you guys. But it all happens with organically valuable, careful methods.

********************

   To me one of the most mesmerizing things about this life story is how Bonhoeffer's strong personal views emerged slowly but vividly over time. How his relationship with God grew against all odds. Employing music, meditation on the scriptures, prayer, and exhaustive reading and writing, he built structure and ritual into his private spiritual walk and saw these efforts flower and fruit into all kinds of beautiful things. He evangelized with his passion as well as his intelligence.

"A truly evangelical sermon must be like offering a child a fine red apple
or offering a thirsty man a cool glass of water then saying 'Do you want it?'"
~Dietrich Bonhoeffer

   The human subject of this biography was himself an accomplished author, penning such modern theological classics as The Cost of Discipleship and Ethics. I'd heard of them but never seriously considered reading them. It now occurs to me that by reading Bonhoeffer's biography before reading his published sermons and books, we can gain plenty. We benefit from watching the student evolve into the teacher through earnest seeking and studying, through personal trials of faith and lots of rich life experiences. In short, reading Bonhoeffer's methods of reasoning and his personal journey make me want to read his conclusions.

   Bonhoeffer asked hard questions of himself and the religious community a large:

• What is the church? 
• What are the differences between religion and spirituality? 
• What is the church's role in the war, and in politics, and in ministry to the oppressed? 
• Is it possible to "sin" while in strict obedience to God? 
• How does morality intersect with legality, and what is grace?
• Is just not doing wrong enough, or aren't we called to go out and do good?
• What is the proper relationship between church and state? 

   These are themes that have been bothering me for a while, since leaving the Catholic church almost twenty years ago and recently having serious troubles with the Protestant church I've been calling home. My book club friend Misti cannot know how incredibly well timed her assignment was.

   Now I am fueled to take responsibility for my own journey of faith and stop blaming the "church," whatever I thought that was. I am excited to see how much can be accomplished in a short length of years, seeing that Bonhoeffer was killed at 39, the age I will reach in a few weeks. I am amazed but not surprised by how much joy can be had in the midst of grief. This happens in my life almost constantly, but I love to see it happen to other people.

********************

   I suppose the religious angles of this book struck me most deeply, but that's just the state of my own being right now. This book offers the reader just as much in every other sphere that it covers, so if you are a World War II history buff or a native German or perhaps a student of sociology or politics, you'll find plenty to keep you interested. And I guarantee you will walk away better informed than you were before, probably with a deeper appreciation for what the German people endured during Hitler's Nazi reign.

   You will learn about the unseen and complicated, gradient resistance against Hitler. You will glimpse the suffering of the many groups he brutalized. You will sense the physical and cultural beauty of that part of the globe then feel the change in its emotional climate as the second World War heats up.

   Metaxas serves so much in this book I have trouble simply telling you about it. It's the story of an exceptional man living in an incredible time, and it is told with great poetry.

********************

   I could talk and talk and talk and write and write and write about this book for hours, but I have many things to do and I know you do as well. Maybe we'll revisit this material again, and I hope you find time to read this book if you haven't already. Before closing please let me share a parting thought... One of Bonhoeffer's friends and colleagues, Martin Niemoller, is credited with writing this poem while imprisoned by Hitler. I think it's telling in so many ways:

First they came for the Socialists,
   and I did not speak out- because I was not a Socialist.
Then they came for the Trade Unionists,
   and I did not speak out- because I was not a Trade Unionist.
Then they came for the Jews,
   and I did not speak out- because I was not a Jew.
And then they came for me-
   and there was no one left to speak for me."

   Also, recalling my personal mantra to be thankful for everything and "Redeem the Time," consider this quote from one of Bonhoeffer's morning devotions:

"Make the most of your time! Time belongs to death, or, still more so, to the devil. We must buy it from him and return it to God, to whom it must really belong. If we inquire the will of God, free from all doubt and all mistrust, we shall discover it. Always give thanks for all things  Everything we cannot thank God for, we reproach him for."

   Wow. I will say once more, find this book and make time for it. And please join the conversations here! Your participation means a lot to me.

"There is meaning in every journey
that is unknown to the traveler."
~Dietrich Bonhoeffer
xoxoxo

The Afterglow of Little Women

   Last month our famous little Dinner Club With a Reading Problem met to discuss Louisa May Alcott's Little Women. It was a grand time, filled with cookie decorating, food eating and eating again, and several fantastic hours of laughter and hugs. Heart-warming stuff, you guys. Seri hosted us and cemented a new holiday tradition!

   Something tells me I have already told you that much already.

   The unfortunate secret, though, is that on that first weekend of December I was all caught up in other books and other projects and wading in the deep pool we call "Christmas" and did not finish this fine book in time to properly explore it with my comrades. What a shame!!! This is among the loveliest, most soul nourishing things I have ever read.

   So here we are now, the first bright weekend of this fresh young year, and I have finally polished off what I agree is a masterpiece. My reflex is to review it like any other book, but reviewing this work seems at best redundant but, more accurately, arrogant.

   Still, this is such a finely layered and solid piece of classic American literature and such a wholesome boost to my spirit personally, that some thoughts beg articulation. Will you please bear with me? And if you have read this fine volume before will you pretty please join this belated discussion??

   How to divide my myriad thoughts on these 578 pages? There's just so much worth keeping from this. More than many other books, for sure. So over the next week or so I will be peppering this little page with what beauty I can extract from Little Women and distill into my own words.

• Wisdom form Mrs. March, the matriarch. 
• The extensive list of other literary works cited in this work. 
• Life themes that sprout and grow as the March children do the same. 
• How Little Women might relate to our study on Proverbs 31. (I bet you thought I had abandoned that again, huh? Well I didn't; I only decided too do it naturally, bot hurriedly.)
• Character analyses and how different people identify with different March sisters.
• How does modern romance compare to the romances then?
• How Little Women helped expand my vocabulary.

   All of that to say that I have more to say, later. And all in the midst of a thousand other things, so I do hope you will drop in now and then this month!

   Have you read Little Women? Did you read it as a student? Who was your favorite character? How can you imagine it applying to modern life? Are you interested in doing a little guest post about Little Women? It would totally earn you honorary membership int our book club!

"I'd no idea hearts could take in so many;
mine is so elastic, it seems full now..."
~Jo March
xoxoxoxo
    



 

A Book Club Event and Book Review: Run With Me

   Hey there fine citizen! This past Thursday evening our famous little Oklahoma book club, known far and wide as Dinner Club With a Reading Problem, enjoyed an especially wonderful discussion dinner. Our selection this go-round was Run With Me: An Accidental Runner and the Power of Poo, by Jennifer Luitwieler. Have you read it? Also, do you read Jen's blog? It is a refreshing balance of philosophy, inspiration, culture, and family. Check her out at jenniferluitwieler.com

   This book was recommended to us by Margi, author of that cool, smart blog called The M Half. Y'all know her as the chick who tried to get me killed in the Pine Forest. Margi reviewed Jen's luscious little piece of non-fiction way back in March of last year, and you can read that right here.

   Okay. Thursday night's event was much more than another pot-luck-and-gab session. We were honored to welcome the author herself into the cramped but cozy living room here at the farm! We circled around her with plates made heavy from comfort foods and desserts, and of course there was plenty of sweet tea and butter. We had a blast and also managed to mostly behave ourselves.

Except for Steph. She is one of our oldest common friends, 

and I am sorry to say that she rarely behaves herself.

Which is mainly why we love her so much.

   Jen indulged us with answers to our questions about her faith, her journey through different churches and role as middle child/ Pastor's daughter, running as a sport, and depression. Depression, so you know, is an important theme in her book, and our little group learned a lot that night. We learned more about this illness and about each other. Some of us shared about personal struggles with depression, and others of us admitted to needing to know how to help loved ones who suffer from it.

Kudos to our guest for maintaining her focus and composure 

while I tried repeatedly to get a focused photo of her pretty face. 

Over anxious hostesses with cameras can be annoying.

   We shared varying perspectives on life and family, family patterns, marriage, the hurt and healing of church and coming of age, and so much more. Six hours of fantastic socializing flew by in a minute, it seemed, and we all agreed that it was the best book club event to date. (We actually say that every single time we meet, but truly, it's gonna be difficult to top an author visiting us in the flesh!)

   My guess is that if we asked each of the ten women who attended Thursday night, "What was the discussion about?" We would hear ten different answers. Because while we probably spent most of our time exploring Depression and its attendant* complications, every varying slice of conversation was meaningful to different women in different ways. For example, I was highly motivated by Jen's chapter on Grace and some of the spiritual observations she made in her book and in our visit. Another couple of our members seemed to be most interested in hearing more about running (me too, by the way... Jen just ran 18 miles on Saturday and is training for another half marathon!). Still more book-clubbers were thirsty for Jen's' guidance in writing and publishing original work. Had we been successful in convincing our guest to stay overnight, we would surely have kept her awake until dawn with the brain-picking. Small wonder, then, that she opted to drive home at night.

This mantra, this slice of her benediction, applies to anything you choose.

   Whatever our specific takeaways, though, one strong theme runs all throughout. And it is actually what Jen uses to end her book, the encouragement to find your thing, whatever it is, and do it well.

"Run far. Run short.

Run north and south, east and west.

Run with me.

Run to everything you were ever meant to be.

Run with me.

Run hard. Run easy. 

Run with me. Run with me. Run with me."

~Jennifer Luitwieler

   I do hope you find or download a copy of this book and read Run With Me. It is a comfortable, smart, witty, conversational offering of one woman's imperfect and nourishing life experiences and how she has profited in surprising ways by lacing up and hitting the pavement.

   You stand to gain so much by reading this book. But the fact remains that we are the lucky ones who got to chat her up and share roasted chicken, cheesy grits, and coconut cake. She shared even more generously in our suppertime conversation. So...Just for fun, how about a list of special facts we learned about this lovely woman during our hours together? This was such fun!

• She also has a book club. And she belongs to various writers groups and leads a weekly writers' discussion on Twitter. All of this, on top of being active in her church and running marathons and mothering three children and homeschooling two of them, AND she perfectly put together and polished. I am in awe.
• She wrote this book in less than a year, originally as a series of blog posts, and revised it over and over.
• Her husband still hasn't read it. tsk-tsk... But we all surmised he was there for most of her stories. He knows what happens, right?
• All of her family's pets are rescues.
• Jen has done several telephone and Skype interviews, but Thursday night at the Lazy W was her first in-person appearance!
• She places high value on small but daily doses of solitude.
• Her unique take on modern Christianity is fascinating. Her remark, "We go to a really weird little church," garnered lots of belly laughs. Then, her descriptions of its uniqueness and community ministries brought smiles to all ten of our faces.
• She just finished her first novel, YAY JEN!!! She wrote Seven Days in May, a volume of historical fiction set right here in Oklahoma, as a participant in NaNoWriMo. This means that she fleshed it out in one month, folks. She is currently shopping agents for its publication and promised us a return visit after its release. We are so excited!!
• Jen is actually a fellow fan of Aimee Bender, author of our group's much-debated read of 2010 The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake (my review here), a fact which when revealed sent peals of laughter through the high-carb room. I do not mind admitting a feeling of vindication. Aaaannnddd... Now I'm craving lemon cake again. As I sit here writing, I may settle for a slice of leftover coconut-lime cake!
• Her running playlist is so rad, ranging from Eminem (yep) to Mumford and Sons (double yep). And I suspect that a few of our ladies will be dipping their polished toes into Couch-to-5K after hearing from her. 
• Jen Luitwieler is one of those women who, though fascinating on paper and perfectly lovely in photos, makes an even more profound impact in person. She is glowy in every sense of that expression: She has the sheen of good health, certainly, but she also emits a lot of love and peace. Wisdom beyond her forty-one years. I am so happy to have made her acquaintance, and I know that all of Dinner Club With a Reading Problem feels the same way.

   Many thanks to Margi for not only selecting this title, but also for inviting our esteemed guest and coordinating this event. Of course, too, many thanks M for running around town with me on Thursday and then letting me boss you around in the final hours before our shin dig. She even dusted artwork and cut flowers for us, ladies!

Part of our Book Club, from left to right: 

Amber, Stephanie, Desiree, Kerri, DeLana, me, Tracy, Margi, Misti, and Melissa. 

And of course our lovely guest Jen in front. 

While snapping photos for us, my husband suggested 

she lay sideways and let us hold her up, cheer-leader style, and she said no.

   Thanks to Kerri for taking charge of our group's token of appreciation. Thanks to Melissa for the thoughtful party favors, the delish cake, and time spent neatening up our brainstorm of questions. Stephanie, Tracy, Amber, DeLana, Misti, and Desiree, thanks for helping to supply such a gorgeous spread of comfort food, including roasted lemon chicken, rolls, sweet corn casserole, garlic-cheddar grits, chocolate cheesecake, fresh salad, and too many beverages! Seri, thanks for bringing your appetizer early even though you couldn't attend! Too sweet. We are the world's best book club for a lot of reasons, and team work is one of them.

"Run to Everything You Were Ever Meant to Be."
~Jennifer Luitwieler
xoxoxoxo

*Jen's artful use of this word in this way has me hooked. I must credit her influence.


 

Let's Pretend This Never Happened (book review)

   This book was such a treat. So funny. So smart, witty and irreverent, and just brutally honest in delightful ways that made me want to give the author a hug. This is another great example of why I love book club with all of my word-starved heart, because without the group assignment I might never have taken the time to read a book whose cover art is a taxidermy mouse wearing a Shakespearean cape and collar. I mean, really.  But I am so, so, so glad Erica chose this title. I REALLY needed a good laugh!

   Author Jenny Lawson has been running her little corner of internet paradise over at The Bloggess for I think about six years now, though I have only recently discovered her. I will be forever more be checking in, because she is flat out funny. Scary funny. Uncomfortable funny. But endearing and smart and relatable, and once more... funny.

   Her memoir is a long, bizarre string of stories from her life, ranging from childhood through young adulthood and early marriage to motherhood and present day. She writes as if she is talking to you privately, face to face, or maybe like she has you trapped on a public bus for several hours of uninterrupted story telling. You sort of feel like you should try and escape but you don't want to, because she is just so mesmerizing.

   In a refreshing change of pace, the book itself reads more like a blog than a traditional novel. Lawson does not apologize for jumping around with wild abandon, nor should she. Her story telling formula (or lack thereof, I suppose) works. She relays enough of herself to make you want to know her better, and somehow she exposes some wild and crazy truths about her family while still being deeply loving and affectionate. So this is neither a filthy private family tell-all nor a complaint session about how hard life is for a middle class woman in a first world country. It is an eyes-wide-open commentary on a remarkably colorful life made by the person living it. And she is so young! The life perspective she has managed to gain in less than four decades is just beautiful.

   Okay, following are some of my favorite juicy, salty tidbits from this delicious (if slightly strange) book. If you have recently read Let's Pretend This Never Happened, then I bet you will LOL with me all over again. If you haven't read it yet, then I predict this list will either further tempt you to buy it or finally send you away shaking your fearful head.

• "I don't even know why I'm having to explain this!"
• Foxen
• Urine perimeter to repel snakes and scorpions and the ensuing (imaginary) peeing contest between husband and father
• Halloween office party, cheerleaders from SNL, no panties
• All things taxidermy, but especially the middle of the night squirrel
• Secret understood translations for Dad's remarks on wild animals
• Mom's impatience for the not-yet-invented Xanax
• Laxatives, solitude, and a cat paw
• Dead pet pug, vultures, a blue tarp, and a hatchet
• Chupacabra
• "I don't even know why I'm having to explain this!" (yes, I meant to duplicate that)
• Victor and his well tested resolve
• Editor's constant notes and insertions. (Were these real? One can only hope.)
• Radio broadcast engagement, seven hours in the car, and suspicions of murder. And urgent pee.
• Pirate gator who speaks French
• "KNOCK KNOCK MUTHA EFFAH!!!"

   Yep, the Eff word appears prolifically throughout the book, because that must be exactly how Jenny (We're on a first name basis now) would tell her stories face to face on a public bus. So if that offends you so much you won't groove reading the book, then I can only say that you're missing out. I respect your standards, but you are missing out on some genuine, sore-ribs-the-next-day, joy-inducing laughter.

   Now, lest I convince you prematurely that Jenny's memoirs are all sunshine and roses, please know that she also deals candidly with some heavy stuff. She acknowledges the burden of psychological illness and shares the details of her ordeal shamelessly. Her candor is as enlightening as it is endearing. And still funny! She writes about her crippling pain with so much natural humor that I walked through my own life laughing at all KINDS of stuff this week! 

   More magnificent reasons to read Let's Pretend This Never Happened: For the soul-quenching dose of perspective and honesty. And for the exposure to what it's like for people who suffer with extreme depression and complex anxieties. I still want to give Jenny a hug, because now I know that nothing I say will help.

   Okay! Have you read this? Is it on your list? Are you a Bloggess fan and want to talk to me about your fave stuff? Dive in!! I still have to wait about forty eight hours before discussing this fine book with my super smart ladies, and that just might be too long.  

No Giant Metal Chickens Were Harmed 

in the Writing of This Book Review

xoxoxoxo

You Take it From Here (Book Review)

   Having just returned from six days in New Orleans, I have three and a half thousand beautiful stories to share with you guys. I really should have been writing constantly all week long to keep up with the inspiration, and in fact I was scribbling things on hotel stationery every day, but I had almost no internet and was too busy enjoying the magic of the French Quarter and my Handsome guy anyway.

   Tonight, instead of Nawlins stuff, I just finished another VEEEERRRY interesting book and have a review to share. Got a few minutes?

http://pamie.com/books/you-take-it-from-here/ 

   Another generous gift from Julia, my most recent selection has been You Take it From Here by Pamela Ribon. It's a new release, and I actually get butterflies in my stomach to realize that as I read these 311 pages, most of it at home floating on our 97-degree pool filled with dragon flies, Ms. Ribon was touring the south talking to her fans about her newest novel.

   One of these days I will finish a book in time to catch its author on tour somewhere and, while snagging an autograph, find time to discuss the original literature at length with its creator. I would really liked to meet Pamela Ribon in particular. She relays through her writing a lot of warmth and empathy that I think would be perfectly delicious in person.

   Okay, the book.

   I liked it a whole lot. I actually like it more and more as it sits in my Creole-stuffed belly, and I expect to want to read it again and also share it with friends and family. It seems to belong to a genre I would not normally say is among my favorite (chic lit maybe?), but that doesn't matter one bit.

   You Take it From Here is immediately engaging, infuriatingly truthful, and wildly thought provoking about big, heavy topics. It weaves together maternal abandonment, cancer, coming of age, divorce, friendship, romance, and more. Ribon effortlessly juggles the weight of so many important themes at once that I am stunned to accept this as fiction. The wanna-be writer inside me kept thinking, Only real life could be so complex and yet so accurate, it's just crazy how she orchestrated this much at once. Pamela Ribon, you have my respect. I found it very easy to relax into your story and let it flow over me.

   Reading this book's teaser might tell you what it's about technically, but only by devouring the actual story cover to cover can you experience all the author wants to give you. Just for fun, though, a sample:

On the heels of a divorce, all Danielle Meyers wants is her annual vacation 

with sassy, life-long best friend, Smidge — complete with umbrella cocktails by an infinity pool — 

but instead she’s hit with the curveball of a lifetime. 

Smidge takes Danielle to the middle of nowhere to reveal a diagnosis of terminal cancer, 

followed by an unusual request: “After I’m gone, I want you to finish the job. 

Marry my husband. Raise my daughter. I’m gonna teach you to how to be Smidge 2.0.”

   I strongly suggest that you read this book if you fall into any of these categories:

• You have ever had a best girlfriend you loved more than a sister, who might even compete with your husband for space in your heart.
• You are a child of divorce.
• You have lost anyone to cancer, but especially a parent, and even more importantly your mother.
• You have left your hometown for a new life but feel that gravitational pull to return even though you are an independent grown up. Especially if the town you left is in the south.
• You have ever fallen in lust before falling in love, with the same man.
• You are SICK of being bossed around by strong willed, controlling, arrogant women.
• You are a strong willed, controlling, arrogant woman yourself. (I admit to hating Smidge right at her introduction, and I was actually relieved when she was soon to be no longer hurting and controlling her friends and family. I know, I am an awful person. But Ribon wrote a terribly difficult character, and I wonder is she maybe intended her readers to detest this cancer patient so we could let go more easily.)
• You are raising a teen aged daughter who is closer to adulthood than you would like. 
• You are a woman. Mother, daughter, sister, friend, any of it. 

    There is something in here for all of us, ladies, and I  hope you give it a few days of your life. I hope you encourage someone you love to read it, too, so you can discuss the emotional tide that will inevitably happen.


   Thank you for sending the book, sweet Julia! And thanks ever so much for writing it, Pamela. I am much better than pleasantly surprised by a new genre; I feel good all over. Just warmed and challenged and inspired to appreciate my health better; to see things from other viewpoints more often; and to love my people more deeply. Reading has, once again, enriched my life. Just as it should. 


Read Outside Your Zone
xoxoxo